You may have come to this post expecting to hear about my fun trip to the Haematologist. But before I post about her (Haema, let's call her), there are many other bits and pieces to be covered.
I guess my blog now is coming closer to the present time.
So before Haema, Alexia leaves and M returns.
And as much as M is a big part of my life, my best friend and my concrete support/rock/anchor, I do not want to focus on him (Sorry M) in this blog. Simply know, that he has returned somewhere mid 2011. From then on he is on bot bot (injecting the Rebif in the top of my bottom) duty every few weeks. And what a stellar job he does. It's very nice to have a break from injecting myself. There was a period of time in the latter part of 2011 where I was just really sick of doing it and I would put it off because it felt like such a chore.
I also have to say here that I am very grateful for my dear sis to have stayed with me for a while when M was away. Although there were arguments and she was annoying (Love you Alexia), it was great to be annoyed. It really was. Oh and there were some goods times of course. I was probably a bitch sometimes. Yes. True. I know. Can you imagine? But, in my defence, I was not in a good way most of the time.
So things are back to usual in the home space. Neighbours is on. M makes comments about the poor acting and unrealistic events, yet I know he secretly loves watching it. It's my time to escape and not think. You know? Yes. You know. You probably do it with Big Bang Theory or something similar.
Anyways, M and I are relaxing after a hard day's work. I think it was a Wednesday. Wednesday's must be cursed. Wednesday's are good though, as it's hump day and the weekend is closer now than it was.
For me, Wednesday's were massive. All classes on, followed by a staff meeting (and gym if I was up for it - BTW, I reached my goal of losing 15kgs). You get what I am saying right? So we are taking it easy lying on the couch and then I feel that my left thumb is weird. I look down. It's moving. It's fucking moving by itself. Twitching.
I feel a panic come over me. It's not constant, but it was sometimes. Like for a few good seconds, maybe 5. Then a 2 second break, then 4 seconds of twitching, then maybe 10 seconds of a break. Unpredictable. Again. Why? I do not like! I do not likey like at all!
I show M. I am unsure as to how much M has taken in the whole MS thing and the possible symptoms that could occur. I don't think he realised straight away that this is Mad Sascha coming out to play. "It's the MS" I said. I wanted to cry. There was my thumb, just moving alone. I watched it. I told it to stop. It did not stop. Freaking. I was a spastic. Literally. It was a small bout of spasticity.
After a few minutes it 'calmed down'. But I was on high alert to see if it happened again. It kinda did, but not as intensely.
The next morning, I drove to work and it was doing it again. I had a little tear sesh in the car. No sobbing, just a few tears. I had mascara on anyways so that stopped me from flooding Palmerston. Again, the twitching was intermittent.
The rest of the day and part of the next morning saw some more thumb twitching. A new symptom that I had not had at all. I sometimes had felt muscle parts twitch in my leg, bum and arms, but not like this. This was constant, even if only in small doses.
The thumb twitching was late September 2011. I haven't had the same symptom since, but I was very paranoid at the time about it being the start of a relapse or the start of a whole new chapter of Mad Sascha. I got confused though. Would just that few days of thumb twitching be considered a relapse? Or is a relapse when my old faithful symptoms find their way back? Am I ever going to get my head around this stupid, annoying illness?!
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